Barca - Quotes Edition

Spending St. Patty's Day weekend in Barcelona was a hilarious adventure to say the least. This post is dedicated to nothing but quotes from the Barcelona trip. They may not be funny to you or by themselves, but coming out of a drunk Englishman's mouth or Brittany's mom's mouth or a drunk Brittany or Kristen, this shit was hilarious.

• Kristen on Gaudi and Spanish architecture: "I don't know I just love it... God I'm such a slut for mosaics."
• Englishman at the bar to Brittany; Kristen: "You just are like, the epitome of an American, like you're dripping it... and you. You don't look like an American... You just look angry... Like you wanna punch me."
• "Swamp tits."
• "Excuse me while I scrape this eyeball off my fork."
• Brittany attaches her entire broken suitcase together with duct tape. "BOOSHY."
• Zaragoza bus station, finally we find the right line for bus tickets for today. "Here it is, tickets for today." After standing in line for ten minutes, Brittany's mom: "Oh look see here we are this is the right line, it says Tickets For Today right here."
• "Well... I'm just happy to be here.
• "Embarrassingly drunk English bachelor #1 with drawn on penis on his pink tights and penguin costume: "TOUCH MY PENIS!"
• British bachelor #2 with his bachelor party at the bar: "You know I don't usually like most Americans." Kristen: "Yeah well me neither." Bachelor: "Oh well in that case it's a pleasure to meet you and shake your hand."
• Brittany's mom: "You know what bothers me so much? How old people have such bad breath and bad teeth. Why do they all have it. It scares me, like one day I'm going to have really bad breath too!"
• Brittany's mom to the waiter: "HAblo espanyol, no wait, anglais?" TOTAL fail
  
• "I don't care where the hell we go I just want a goddamn Guinness on St. Patty's Day."
• Brittany: "WHY DOESN'T ANYONE HAVE MY VODKA NEGRO?"
• Kristen and BB#2 at bar: "Pretty American girl dancing with meee" .. "So when are you getting married again, 4 weeks?" .. "Why'd you have to bring that up?" as he proceeds to walk away and sit down at the bar.